My Testimony

Subject: Re: My Testimony

Comments:
: I grew up in the Catholic Church. My mom was quite involved and so I naturally became involved with Church things like Sunday school and fund raisers. This all ended when I was about 10 and we moved to a small town and had problems finding a Church. After trying for about two years we just gave up and stop going. : My life was really hard for me through out high school and first couple of years at college. In high school I had a small group of friends but I never did that much with them outside of school. It was always hard for me to hear about the things they did on the weekends with each other. I don't know why I was never called or invited to join in with them. I know they were not mad at me, but for some reason I was always left out. Others saw and knew how great of friends we were at school. In my junior year of high school I got my first boyfriend, I was so happy to have someone that would call me and be able to hang out with and go to movies and such. Our relationship only lasted about a year. We ended up having different interest during our senior year and couldn't find the time to be with each other, for the last couple months of our relationship it didn't seem like we really had one, so I broke up with him. It didn't seem like it would make that much of a difference if we were going out or not. Also at this same time my friends and I were spending less time talking and doing things at school. I was feeling like I was alone and that no one cared for me. My senior year of high school, no one came to my graduation open house, I didn't have anyone to go to the Prom with, and most people didn't know what my plans for college were. That summer I was thinking that it wouldn't make a difference if I was in this world any longer. I was so depressed, didn't have anyone to talk to, and didn’t think anyone cared about me. I had gone as far as having a plan of committing suicide and writing a note to my parents. I was able to get through the summer with out caring out this plan. : My first year of college I became really good friends with a person on my floor in the dorms. We did just about everything together, went shopping, to movies, and just plain hung out. Our relationship really wasn't that real, I had been telling her lies about my past, making it sound like I had good friends in high school. I had been making up stories about the things we would do with each other. As it can happen with lies, I couldn't keep track of everything I told her and she found out that I had been lying to her. This ended our relationship and once again I was back to thinking that no one cared about me. This caused me to slip back in to my state of depression. This time it was even worse because I was away from home, so I was even feeling like I didn't have my parents love. I started talking over the counter mood enhancement pill to try to get better, a long with sleeping pills to calm my mind and be able to sleep. I ended up becoming addicted to the sleeping pills. : At the beginning of my Junior year of college a friend of mine invited me to go to a meting of Intervarsity Christian Fellowship, I went mainly because they had free pizza and Pop. but I got so much more out of it than that. : I learned a lot from that first meeting a decided to go back next week. I continued to go each week, I was able to learn so much more about God. At the time this was more important, but I was able to get some really good and true friendship out of it. I was still having some of my depression problems and addictions. I was thinking like you are I'm praying for God to take these things away, but He must not want me to cause it's not working. : The summer after my junior year of college I had a desire to seek Christ even more. I started reading the Bible. I got involved with Chi Alpha ministries by joining prayer walks during the summer. I probaly drove the Chi Alpha paster crazy by e-mail him almost every day with questions I had about Christianity, but it was a way for me to learn and figure things out. I also started going to Church and Sunday school. It was in July of 2001 that I was able to say a prayer and ask Jesus into my heart. Just by being involved with the Christian group and making a few friends I was able to being to over come my depression. It wasn’t until after I gave my life to Christ that I was able to be completely out of my depression stage. It was about a month until I was able to over come my addiction : By joining both Chi Alpha and Intervarsity I had gotten to know so many people and have made some really good friends who I know care about me and have given me a reason for living. : But the most important relationship that I have gotten is the on that I will always have and that is the one I have with our Lord and Savior. : God works in such mysterious ways. I was shown God's love by going to a meeting for free pizza and a year later I got a relationship with God. : Blessings and thanks for reading all this : Angel Kisses

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